5 dictator-esque things Donald Trump has done in the last 24 hours - including the unsettling AI video

There's a good rule of thumb that an incumbent leader trying to perform a coup d'etat to make his or her power permanent has to make sure of two things.

First, you have to ensure you're in control of the Generals. Then you have to take control of communication and media - traditionally TV and Radio.

From there, you can perform what's known as an "auto-coup" - a self-coup where a legitimately elected leader collects enough power at the centre that he or she can shut down or ignore the authority of the other branches of government.

Last week, Donald Trump fired the United States Military's most senior officer - the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff - and replaced him with retired Air Force Lt General Dan 'Raizin'' Cain.

Mr Cain, according to stories told by Trump, wore a MAGA hat in meetings with the President during his first term.

The claim was denied by a Pentagon official, but Trump clearly believes he has a loyal general in charge of his military.

So that's step one. Let's see how long it takes to get to step two.

Oh.

1. He seized control of the means of communication

For decades, the pool of journalists writing the official record of the President's words and movements has been managed by the White House Correspondents Association - an independent group of professional Washington reporters from all sides of the political spectrum.

Each day a different outlet writes the official pool report - with authors being assigned from a wide variety of outlets, from the Washington Post and HuffPo to the Daily Mail and the Wall Street Journal. While there's a little colour in there, it's usually a fairly straight, factual record of events. The President boarded Air Force One at this time. He went to a McDonalds at this time.

It's done as a factual record because it's used by different outlets all over the world - all of whom put their own spin on it - but because everyone does it for everyone else, they all do a straight job that everyone can use. It's like a journalistic Mexican standoff - if someone does a bad job of it, everyone has bad copy.

Anyway, last night Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt announced that those days are over.

Instead of the independent WHCA deciding who does the pool report each day, the list will now be managed by the White House press team - something Leavitt insisted was returning "power to the people".

Let's be really clear about this - even if established and trustworthy media organisations take part in this arrangement, what comes out of the pool reports going forward will be sanctioned and approved by Trump's White House. It should therefore, I'm sad to say, be treated with great scepticism.

2. Trump Gaza! Number ONE!

Now, I suspect many of you will have seen this already - but as an old boss of mine used to say, it's worth recording.

Donald Trump, on his Truth Social account, posted an AI generated video and song showing a vision of what a Trump-owned and branded Gaza Strip would look like.

It's complete with a "TRUMP GAZA" hotel, a 40ft tall statue of the man himself looking remarkably svelte, and - blink and you'll miss them - a pair of bikini babes with long black beards.

The song is almost inhumanely catchy, and it culminates with an image of Trump and Benjamin Netenyahu laying next to each other on sun loungers.

This really set the tone for the day.

3. Hawked new merch from the Oval Office

In case you were wondering whether the sanctity of the Oval Office couldn't be debased any further, during a press pool spray, Trump piled up a stack of new hats on the Resolute Desk - which read: "TRUMP WAS RIGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING"

He offered freebies to reporters, who politely declined - even after Secretary of Commerce Howard Lutnick admonished them: "Always say yes to the President. Always say yes to the President."

The headwear is now available on Donald Trump's website, which you can Google for yourself, for the low, low price of $40.

Behind him stood two of his most high profile stooges: Lutnick, who laughed and cooed over the President's every word - and RFK Jr, who was there about an executive order on drug pricing, who looked on with what appeared to be horror and embarrassment.

And when the guy whose brain was eaten by a worm and dumped a bear in Central Park thinks you're taking it too far...

4. Computer says "you're fired"

According to Wired, Elon Musk's script-kiddy squad are working on software to automate firing government employees.

They're said to be modifying code designed for the Department of Defence to automate the process of force reduction in the military to work for the entire government.

This comes after Musk sent an in no way legally enforceable email asking employees to tell him what they did last week in order to "check they have a pulse."

5. The Trump card for oligarchs

Donald Trump unexpectedly announced plans to allow Russian oligarchs to buy US citizenship for $5m.

The plan is to introduce a "Gold card" - you see, like a green card but more expensive - that would allow basically anyone with enough cash to become a citizen.

"We're gonna be selling a gold card. You have a green card, this is a gold card. We're gonna be putting a price on that card of about $5 million and that's gonna give you green card privileges plus," he said.

"It's gonna be a route to citizenship. And wealthy people will be coming into our country by buying this card."

"They'll be wealthy and they'll be successful and they'll be spending a lot of money and paying a lot of taxes and employing a lot of people."

Asked specifically if that would include Russian oligarchs, Trump said that it would.

"Yeah, possibly," he said. "Hey, I know some Russian oligarchs who are very nice people. They're not quite as wealthy as they used to be."

In fairness, we should note that this isn't hugely different from the Tier 1 (investor) visa the UK used to have - which was nicknamed the "Golden Visa".

The visa allowed anyone who invested £2m in qualifying projects to come to the UK and apply for permanent residence.

The visa was scrapped in response to Russia's invasion of Ukraine, and after a study found a "small minority" of individuals using the route posed a "high risk" of money laundering or other criminality.

Asked today whether the government would like to see a "Gold Card" introduced in the UK, Keir Starmer's spokesman said he was "not aware of any plans to do so".